Always a Blogsmaid

The Birds and the Bees

If you are looking for clean, modern but romantic invitation design, look no further than The Bee Paperie.  The name comes from the phrase "bee in your bonnet" because these ladies are simply obsessed with stationary design.  They do custom work, but here are some of their pre-existing designs that I fancied.  They offer patterned backs, which I've noticed is a growing trend with invitations. I sort of love the peach one, mainly because I think peach is going to be THE new color..... it's awesome with brown, grey, navy.  I think i'm going to do a peach post... hmmm...

Non-Rehearsal?

The Q:  My ceremony and reception are all in one location and there is a wedding the night before mine.  This means I can't have a rehearsal there the night before.  What do I do?  And what do I call my "rehearsal dinner"?

The A:  This is better for you!  Bridal parties never remember the directions from the night before anyway- or, more accurately, they are nervous and THINK that they don't remember, so they second guess themselves.  Build into your day time for the wedding party to arrive early- an hour before the ceremony at least.  Have them do a "walk through".  You don't need to be a part of it.  Luckily, it's very obvious where you will stand once you get to the end of the aisle :-)  This way it will be fresh in everyone's head anyway!

As for dinner, call it what it is: 'Dinner the Night Before' or "Night Before the Plunge" Dinner, or, as I've seen "Join us for a Non-Rehearsal, Rehearsal Dinner".  Don't worry about the name- it's the gathering on the eve of your wedding that's important!

Mini Wedding, Major Shower?

The Q: Good morning, and thank you for reading my email.  I am having an intimate wedding (~40 guests). The guests will include family members and the bridal party. My two bridesmaids are interest in planning a bridal shower for me. I have thought of having close friends who are not invited to the wedding to the shower. I DO NOT want gifts from the shower guests. I would, however, like guests to have the option to contribute quotes, antidotes, words of wisdom, etc during the shower. Is it proper etiquette to invite friends to shower who are not invited to the ceremony, even when gifts are not solicited? -Chandra

The A: Chandra, I'm going to answer your question, but then I'm going to tell you what to do.  To answer your question, NO, it's not proper etiquette to invite friends to a shower who aren't invited to the wedding itself.  But, my question is, WHO CARES if it's proper, especially if you aren't asking for gifts?  (which people will bring anyway.... they just will).

Years ago my friends' sister-in-law invited me to her bridal shower (I'd known her for years, so not that weird) but I wasn't invited to her very, very small destination wedding.  Neither were about 50% of the 80 or so women at the shower.  My grandmother was horrified! I was relieved! I thought we were getting off easy:  no travel, no hotel costs, no wedding gifts.  I was really happy to buy her fancy sheets off her registry.

The point is just because you are having a small wedding doesn't mean you need to have a small bridal experience.  You deserve the well wishes, the "recipes for a good marriage", the toilet paper wedding gown contest. Chandra, you deserve it all!

If you don't want presents, I would suggest that your girlfriends indicate on the invite no-presents OR, better yet, WISHING WELL only, and set a price limit.  Wishing well is a great way to still have the experience of opening the presents, getting to have a hat made out of ribbons and paper plates without your guests going nuts with spending. (here is my friend Candy in her silly hat- her destination wedding will have 2 people there :-)

 

May Day!

Mayra is actually too busy to post lately, (it seems she has some actual weddings to plan...go figure :-) but she REALLY, really liked these invitations from A Day in May and wanted me to spread the word and share the love with you!

I don't know if some of you have noticed, but there are just a TON of great graphic design shops out in San Francisco doing awesome custom wedding invites and A Day in May was one of these great companies.... until now!  They are now ALSO in New York and blessing East Coast brides with their gorgeous letterpress designs at relatively reasonable prices (it's still Letterpress). 

Actually, we've had our eye on A Day in May for some time.... they've been featured in some amazing magazines from Martha Stewart to Elegant Bride and more.  From the classic to the downright special, they have all the bases covered.  Here are some of the ones that Mayra liked (and I like them too!)

Sunny Showers with Ink Umbrella!

I love great stationary, especially when it's got a lot of personality.  So, I REALLY liked Jane Tomlinson's line Ink Umbrella. This former bride and graphic designer has translated her knowledge of creating brand identity into a skillful art of creating Wedding Identity. From wedding announcements to rehearsal dinner invites,  tags and labels and of course, the invites themselves, Ink Umbrella has got it covered (ha! I made a punny!)

AND, she is offering that skillful art to Always a Blogsmaid readers at 10% off!

All on One Card

The Q:  I will be getting married in May.  Is it ok if the information for the invitations contain
invite from parents, church location and reception location.  I am trying to save on costs. all this information would be on  card and then separate rsvp card would be mailed.  any suggestions. thanks.

The A: To be honest, this is not my preference if the events are taking place in separate locations, but I'm not begrudging anyone who is looking to save money.  My issue with it is that it seemingly makes the invite look cramped, because it needs to have the full address of both ceremony site and reception site.  If your venue provides a map or direction card that has their address, my suggestion would be to include it and simply do the following:

Mr. and Mrs. Smith
invite you to the marriage of their daughter
Miss Smith
to
John Smith
on
Sunday, the twentieth of September
two thousand and nine
at four o'clock in the afternoon

St. Igantius Church
555 W. 55th Street
New York City, New York

Reception to Follow at
Guastavino's Restaurant
New York City

But those are my two cents.  Otherwise, if you don't have an item with the reception address then you'll simply need to include it!

Hostess with the Mostess

The Q: My daughter is getting marrried this may and as of yet her maid of honor has not discussed with me her plans for the shower. I know that the girls in the party cannot afford to rent a place for the occasion. I have some ideas for where the shower could be. Would it be ok for me to cover the cost of a location. Also my daughter has expressed that she would like it to be held at my home. Howerver, I dont think I can fit the 40 -45 people she wants to invite. What should I do? wait for the maid of honor to approach me. and if so how long. Or should I offer my suggestions. Lastly what time before the wedding should a shower be held . Thanks

The A: It's actually increasingly common for the MOB to help with the costs associated with the shower, especially in Metro Areas where people have less space and not everyone can host a home-based shower. It's not "Post-Approved" etiquette, but for what it's worth, it's Blogsmaid approved etiquette for you to contact the MOH and say that you would really like to "help" with the shower by covering the cost of a location so that her and the other bridesmaids can put their money and energy into the other parts- favors, a little cake, decorations, etc. You should bring this up pretty soon because ideally showers are about 2-3 months before the wedding. This schedule helps your guests not feel totally overwhelmed by the wedding and gift buying.

In terms of the stuff about your home and your daughter wanting a home based shower, I think that space is the most important consideration. I feel like you should seriously consider if you could fit everyone, but if you can't make it work, don't feel too badly about it. Your ultimate goal is for her to have a lovely shower, and your warm intention won't be missed!

You've Come a Long Way Baby!

A couple of years ago I got an email from Holly Hatam contacted me.  She was in town for a business incubator from Canada and was starting her own line of unique, whimsical wedding invitations, called Tear Drop Weddings. She was wonderfully sweet and we chatted over email now and then ever since. She sent me some sample designs early on and I thought they were truly unique.  Well, imagine my surprise when, while strolling through the 4PM Wedding Salon yesterday, there she was in the flesh!  Tear Drop Weddings had a booth and so I ran over to introduce myself.  It was wonderful getting to meet Holly and even more wonderful to see how far her business AND her gorgeous invitations have come. Her designs are even more unique now than ever, and each suite is gorgeously letterpressed on wonderful papers.  She maintains her unique "voice" as a designer- creating these personalized artworks, really- but has added some glamour as well.  Here are some of my favorites.

Rehearsal Dinner Alternatives

The Q:  We have a lot of out of town guests and my mother is insisting that I invite them all to the rehearsal dinner because that is proper etiquette.  I am sort of conflicted, I don't want it to seem like a second wedding.  How should I handle this?

The A: This is a growing issue as more and more weddings involve lots of out of town guests.  Obviously, you want them to feel welcome and provide your guests with an activity since they came all this way for you, but also, you are holding one wedding, not two. 

One thought is to go in the complete opposite direction of your wedding the next day. If it is semi-formal or formal, consider finding a family style Italian restaurant for the rehearsal dinner or even a brick oven pizza or BBQ restaurant.  These are usually both more economical AND will strike a tone that is strikingly different than your wedding reception. 

The other thought, and I've been doing this with our clients more and more, is to host a "meet and greet" cocktail.  It's less formal and rigid (and costly) than a full dinner, gives your guests a chance to mingle and can be held in your headquarters hotel or a bar local to that hotel.  It also still can preserve your more private rehearsal dinner where your family and wedding party can make toasts in a more intimate setting.  Don't feel compelled to cover the bar all night long- you can pick up the first couple of rounds, or an hour or two of beer and wine, and if your guests want to stay all night, no one will stop them!

CECI for Everybody!

I'm terribly excited (and not just because of the Martha Stewart Show taping, which I will write more about later) to share with you some of the designs from CECI's new White Label Collection.  For those of you who stalk wedding style, you'll be familiar with Ceci's custom invitations which have been featured in countless, countless magazines.  Gorgeous, but custom isn't always for everyone.    So I was delighted to hear that Lisa Hoffman, the founder and designer there, has launched a line of ready to order invitations and accessories for all kinds of brides: the Destination Bride, Ornate (or Vintage) Bride, Botanical Bride and the Classic Bride. There are more than 30 looks in the line, but for now, here are six of the fabulous designs!  For right now, you should contact CECI directly at [email protected]