The Q: "my daughter has decided to have a destination wedding. she is thinking of having everyone go on a weeklong cruise and at some point get off on an island and have a champagne and cake wedding. or at best have a wedding on a cruise ship. she feels it would be less hectic and much less planning involved than a regular church and reception. In your experience would it be that way and do u have any ideas. I tell her to really think about it. It seems so much more costlier for wedding guests. Thanks in advance."
The A: I actually have PRETTY strong feelings about this issue, so reader beware, that this is loaded with my "opinions" and not just professional advice. As I've previously posted, while destination weddings can be a lot of FUN FUN FUN for your guests and family to get to bond and have a great time, the WAY in which you do it can make or break this being a fun, easy and relaxing event for all vs. a source of stress and contention.
A cruise sounds great, but a week sounds really excessive. It's a lot to ask people to commit an entire weekend of their time and money to a wedding, but a whole week involves infinite amounts of scheduling, child care (potentially) and financial issues, so I think that if this is an idea she wants to explore, a weekend cruise might be the best and most extensive way to go. That said, I think that how good of an idea this is, depends on WHO you are inviting.
Look, when people make up a guest list you have people who get an invite because you are hoping they will come and then there are people who get an invite who have no choice but to attend (your sisters, for instance, your BF from childhood, your godmother). Before you commit to a destination wedding it's important for you to consider how much of a burden or strain this choice will be on THOSE guests. The ones who simply must "figure it out" and get it together to come. If you find that there are too many of those guests to count, and you (or your daughter) aren't able to manage to make it more convenient for them, then it's a bad call.
Generally speaking, the more comfortable destination brides aim to make their guests, the more involved and STILL STRESSFUL the planning becomes. If your daughter really wants this to be a no-frills, no-stress affair, then everyone will need to adopt the attitude of "no obligations, no hard feelings, if you can come you come, and if you can't, no problem!"
Hope that helps!
